


"Aku Cinta Kamu..."

by 247Elena



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types
Genre: Alec Lightwood Loves Magnus Bane, Also Hurt Magnus, Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Romance, Declarations Of Love, Emotional Hurt, Hurt Alec, Injured Alec Lightwood, M/M, Magnus Bane Loves Alec Lightwood, One Shot, S3E10 Coda, Spoilers for 3x10, episode coda
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-16
Updated: 2018-05-16
Packaged: 2019-05-07 21:38:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14679993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/247Elena/pseuds/247Elena
Summary: One-Shot from Season 3 Episode 10. Spoilers if you have yet to see this episode.Alec felt oddly warm despite it all, nestled in Magnus's arms. His mind tugged at memories more pleasant than the one he was currently in, memories of other times where he and Magnus had nestled in each other's embrace. The memories starkly contrasted the grim scene painted in that alley that now only occupied Magnus and Alec...





	"Aku Cinta Kamu..."

**Author's Note:**

  * For [TheUsagi1995](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheUsagi1995/gifts).



> I would like to say that this is my first attempt at a one shot. But after this episode I just had to.
> 
> A big thank you to TheUsagi1995 for your lovely support and continued feedback for my story and writing. I would have never started posting on here without your nudge into it. So a very special thank you and I hope you enjoy this story.

Alec felt oddly warm despite it all, nestled in Magnus's arms. His mind tugged at memories more pleasant than the one he was currently in, memories of other times where he and Magnus had nestled in each other's embrace. The memories starkly contrasted the grim scene painted in that alley that now only occupied Magnus and Alec, an arrow sticking crudely out of the fallen Nephilim and the Warlock unable to prevent Mother Nature from taking its course. As fearful as Alec was in that moment, he couldn't help but feel safe in the Warlock's presence. He scrambled for that feeling, clutched onto like a child snatching their mother's hand in an unfamiliar place, scared of the unknown that surrounded them. Because reminding himself of Magnus and all the times they had spent together kept at bay the ebbing realisation that he may not just get any more of those moments and he wanted to remember them all at once before he wouldn't be able. A smile settled over Alec's face.

  
The smile made Magnus unbalanced, his fingers fretting over a wound he couldn't fix. Acting as though if he moved them the way he used to, perhaps a spark of what once was there would again return, even if it was the last of his magic, even if that meant he could never use it again. "Why are you smiling?"

  
Alec's smile widened, though it twitched with the movement and jerked with pain. His hand found Magnus's after a moment, first grappling blindly at the air before finding a place in Magnus's. Alec squeezed his hand and kept it as though he knew Magnus needed the reassurance that he was still alive, needed that touch to confirm it. "Because I'm happy."

  
Magnus huffed an empty laugh at the statement. Because he felt anything but, though it settled him at least knowing that Alec was happy at this moment. "How can you be happy, Alexander?"

  
Alec was silent for a second and that, Magnus recounted, was the longest second of his life. A stillness overcame Alec's body and Magnus found himself shifting, as though prepared to pick Alec up and run him to Catarina instead of waiting for her to come. But then Alec squeezed his hand once more and a wash of relief resounded through Magnus's body.

  
"Because..." Alec paused. "Because if I don't, I think of how afraid I am."

  
"Certainly not you, Alexander." Magnus retorted, a smile though dampened by his sadness and fear, did grace his features. "You are the bravest Shadowhunter I have ever had the privilege of knowing."

  
But Alec knew the truth, despite Magnus's kind words. He was struck with a fatal flaw that shouldn't reside in a Shadowhunter by nature. A part that had festered and grown within the last year that he couldn't deny in the raw moment of it all. It was something he hadn't known how to confront, had lashed out at in an attempt to push it into the furthest recesses of his being. Yet it had bubbled to his surface, rising like a sickeningly sweet realisation and now he found that he couldn't lie to the man he blatantly loved for it.

  
"Magnus, for the f-first time I'm afraid of dying."

  
Magnus sucked in a breath, letting the words wrap around him.

  
"S-Shadowhunters aren't meant to be but I c-can't leave you alone. I don't want to go."

  
And suddenly those words constricted like a confining rope that coiled around him. Alexanders fears of mortality and death resonating like a drum in his head that crescendoed into a deafening reminder.

  
"Silly Nephilim, you aren't going to die," Magnus reassured, soothing his other hand around Alec's shoulder, rubbing circles into his arm. "Alexander, help is almost here."

  
"I know." And as Alec looked at Magnus with pain-filled hazel eyes, he couldn't find himself ridding himself of the shaky smile that still hung on his lips. "I'm alright, Magnus."

  
Magnus clung to those words, avoiding the creeping fears of his own that threatened him at the time seemed to draw on longer without any signs of help. _He will not make it_. Catarina is the best in the healing arts. _The wound is fatal_. And Alexander would be fine. _After so much time, even warlock magic is useless._ Magnus ignored those fears, that knowledge that dawned on him with each passing second, letting himself and Alexander have this moment. Even if Alec's face was steadily paling and his breathing was coming out in rasp as he struggled to draw in air.

  
"Magnus..."

  
"Hush now, Alexander."

  
"I need to..."

  
"You need to save as much strength now."

  
"Please..."

  
"Hush. We're not doing this."

  
A laugh racketed through Alec's body, Magnus feeling how shaky it was. "You're worth it as well."  
As Alec spoke those words, Magnus tensed under him staring down at the man. Magnus almost found himself forgetting about everything that day, about everything that had happened.

  
"Listen-" the Nephilim gasped, his hand once again squeezing the Warlock's own. "Please."

  
Magnus had wanted to refuse. Wanted to reason that Alec must save his strength until help arrived. But selfishly he found himself also refusing so that Alec wouldn't speak, and say things that couldn't be unsaid. He would say things that Magnus feared, truths that he didn't want to realise and in the end, if this was Alec's last moments break Magnus's heart even further. Magnus didn't want to let him, but looking at his Nephilim's face, he found he couldn't deny him that. Alec's hazel eyes were clouding ever so slightly as he looked at Magnus, the grip on the Warlock's hand had never faltered in those moments.

  
Alec coughed, blood specked his lips. And the fear started to rush Magnus. The arrow must have pierced a lung, now filling with fluid and drowning him. Alec could see the tears welling in Magnus's eyes, only held back by the Warlock's will. And all too quickly, Alec's own vision had darkened. Where once he had seen the lights of the streets and the glitter of the stars, he now saw black, and soon Magnus's own face was fading into the shadows that had lurked around them. Alec felt himself panic, perhaps jolt in Magnus's arms. It was happening, what he feared and he couldn't find himself wanting to go just yet. He didn't want to go! So many things he had wanted to say now slipping from him. His angelic power seemed to seep and fade from him, his limps slacking in the Warlock's embrace and he found himself numb to it all. His strength had left him so suddenly that he was unable to speak, desperately wishing to console Magnus from the panic that he must be feeling.

  
He was clouded by the thoughts of the box, and he would have chuckled if he could. He didn't want Magnus to mourn, to linger on his loss. He wanted to tell Magnus all that, yet Alec couldn't find the strength to speak and still cling to the light that still rimmed his eyes. Perhaps he couldn't say all that he wished to before that light faded but maybe all he needed to say was one last thing.

  
He felt his lips move, his voice distant and rough to his ears yet muffled as though he were hearing it submerged in water. "I... love... you." Alec chocked out, hardly loud enough that Alec feared that Magnus didn't hear it. Alec's hand still remained in Magnus's own, though the grip had waned in strength.

  
The tears that had brimmed Magnus's eyes had long since fallen, and he found himself shaking as he cradled Alec.

  
"Aku Cinta Kamu..."

**Author's Note:**

> ...
> 
> After the episode aired I couldn't help but write this scene! Just FYI, Alec ain't dead in this story, Catarina is a badass who can fix anything so yeah.  
> But what are your thoughts? Did you like it or hate it? Let me know! Were you as desperate for fanfic after the episode as I was? And *shameless self promo* if you liked this story be sure to take a look at my other one.  
> BTW if you see any errors, just let me know. I
> 
> You can find me on tumblr at parabataibros, if you're confused about which account, my icon is Harry Shum Jr wearing a Christmas hat, I have yet to change it to suit the season and I frankly can't be bothered so it's staying.


End file.
